Snow: *Is pretending
the bag is Charming as she shoves all the arrows into it over and over and over
again*
Charming: So
honey, do you think if I stay long enough, I’ll start to become part of the
forest like the guys in Davy Jones ship in the Pirates movies?
Snow: You’re not
helping!
Charming: What?
Emma: Mommy and
daddy are fighting about serious life and death situations! Just like a real
family!
Emma: Wouldn’t
have minded skipping this part though honestly.
Snow: Don’t you
have serious mission to go get ready for while we…go find Tinkerbelle to tell
her we have a way off and hope Pan’s not listening at the time?
Emma: Hey now! I
don’t want to squabble with you when I’m going to be listening to squabbling
the whole way to the cave. I’m pretty sure the shadows are going to know we’re
coming even before we arrive.
Snow: Can’t I be
furious at your father in peace?
Emma: Not when a
manipulative psycho that wants this sort of thing is flying around! For God’s
sakes, why can’t we just get along?
*Love Triangle
staring contest*
Emma: I really
wish I was with your team right now…
Snow: Good let’s
switch.
Emma: I don’t wish
it that much.
Henry: So worried
about Pan finding out about me knowing my parents are here…I can’t tell him, I
can’t tell him…
Henry: IKNOW MY
FAMILY IS HERE AND YOU’RE LYING
Pan: Wait, what?
Pan: I’m….not….lying….
Pan: *Face contorts
like it usually does when he’s caught in his own lie*
Pan: *Is certain that
this is Felix’s fault* If your family that actually loved you was here, I would
tell you. But some other losers came and we don’t talk about them.
Henry: LIES
Pan: *Contort face*
Pan: What do you
know? You’re not even twelve!
Henry: Dude, I
lived with a woman that was lying to me for years. You think I can’t spot a
fibber?
Pan: …. I didn’t
think of that.
Pan: Except
you’re going to completely wrong way….
Felix: I told you
this wasn’t going to work
Pan: No one
freaking asked you, Felix.
Pan: We’re just
going to have to manipulate him a little more.
Pan: Why are you
smirking?
Felix: Because
his family is full of manipulators, you think he won’t spot one?
Pan: ……
Pan: Nooooooo?
Felix: This plan
is doomed.
Hook: Hey! These
are my books!
Baelfire: Yuuuup.
Hook: I WAS
LOOKING FOR THOSE FOR THREE HUNDRED YEARS!
Baelfire: *giggles*
Emma: Look, mom
and dad are gone. And the tension was so thick that it’s STILL there; can we
get a move on?
Baelfire: We will
go soon enough! As soon as I find my favorite pet coconut. *Random Rumple gesture*
Hook: *Facepalms and
actually remembers not to hit himself with the hook this time*
Emma: Oh wait, I
snagged that! I’ll go get it! *scampers
off*
Hook: Dude, I
know this probably isn’t the best time, considering we’re all about to go
possibly die but Emma and I totes made out and you weren’t invited.
Baelfire: What? I
couldn’t hear you over getting ready to save my son.
Hook: I said we
were rolling all over the jungle floor playing tonsil hockey. Rolled down some
trees too. What? She didn’t tell you?
Baelfire: I’m
confused at why you think she would.
Hook: *Is playing
him* Oh. My bad then.
Baelfire: *is
wondering if he has time to punch Hook in the face hard enough to knock him out
and blame Pan for it*
Hook: We’re totes
okay, right?
Baelfire: Seriously,
my son’s life is in danger and you’re bringing this up now?
Hook: I’m not
caught up with the other world’s customs. Is that a yes or no?
Baelfire: *Is
seriously about to belt him and claim he slipped on a banana peel*
Emma: I found the
coconut! Dad was using it to smash bugs for lunch.
Baelfire: *Plotting
his death*
Emma: Aww, look
at you two getting along and everything!
Baelfire: Check
out my stellar coconut.
Hook: You only
have one. You should get that checked out.
Baelfire: Obviously
that’s all I need.
Hook: *Is insulted*
Emma: What are we
talking about?”
Emma: Wait, I
don’t want to know
Emma: Are we
ready?
Hook: I’m always
ready.
Emma: *Has been
hanging out with Rumple and him for so long she can’t tell if that’s an
innuendo or not*
Hook: ….are we
going? Because I have no clue where I’m supposed to go….
Baelfire: Sweet.
Baelfire Cassidy Stiltskin for team leader then…
Emma: Well I
didn’t vote for you…
*Can’t believe Bae
took the situation and turned it to his advantage*
Belle: Where did
he put that teacup?
Belle: Nope, not
up there…
Ariel: That’ll go
in Regina’s throat real good, don’t you think? Maybe this time I won’t miss her
spinal column
Ariel: It’s all
twisty….
Belle: Uh…you
better be careful, the last guy that stole from Rumple got beaten on his own
ship and nearly got fireball'd….and the one before him got tortured and nearly
shot….it’s usually not too beneficial to steal from my man…
Ariel: What he
won’t know won’t hurt him! *Shoves it in her already bulging pockets*
Belle: That’s it!
He put it in the cabinet that keeps thieves away!
Ariel: I solved
the mystery!
Belle: *Won’t let
her relevancy be taken from her* Ffffffffff
Belle: *Is humoring
her* Sure Ariel….you were relevant….
Belle: Aw…I
remember the time he terrified me so much I dropped this cup. And then he
DIDN’T beat me like I was terrified he might for dropping it. Those were the
early days of our love after he bought me in exchange for getting rid of the
ogres.
Ariel: This does
not sound like a story I want to hear…
Belle: Oh right,
the saucer…
Belle: *Puts in the
security combination where Ariel can’t see*
Ariel: LIGHTS!
Belle: Oh hey,
under the trap door where he really keeps thieves away…
Belle: I’m
surprised there isn’t more here with how everyone comes tromping in to steal
things.
Belle: Oh my god,
this power!
Belle: With this
box, I can get back at the people that wronged me ever in my life starting with
my father and Regina, and Smee, and Hook, and all the losers that forgot I
existed last season…
Ariel: Humans are
weird…
Belle: I’m holding
a box! Yay!
Ariel: So can we
go now? I sort of would like to get going by some time next year…
Belle: *Squee* *squee* *squee*
Belle: Sorry,
what?
Belle: *Squees some
more*
John: Hand over
the box!
Michael: Why’d
you leave the door unlocked for?
Belle: What box?
John: The box we
saw you put behind your back!
Belle: * Drops with a
loud clatter* What box?
Michael: STOP
HEADBUTTING ME!
Belle: *stomps with
her heels*
Michael: STOP
STOMPING ME!
John: Look, I’ll
shoot you!
Belle: Don’t
believe him, Ariel. That’s the water guns that Rumple and I use during our role-play.
John: *Knew he
should’ve just gone for the sword in the front room and not the gun*
Michael: Now tell
us everything or I’ll show you my chest!
Belle: No.
Michael: Oh…*Has no idea what to do* “Okay then…”
Michael: Pan’s
totes going to use this for diabolical reasons…
Ariel: *Spits at
John*
Ariel: You’ll
never get us to say anything while we’re alive!
John: My glasses!
Don’t you ruin them; they’re my only pair for the last 300 years!
Michael: Grr!
Belle: There’s
good in you! I can feel it!
Ariel: *Rolls eyes*
John: Does
that….usually work?
Belle: Sometimes!
John: We are far
too clever for such trickery!
Belle: I…really
don’t buy that…
John: *Lip quivers*
Belle: I mean
seriously, you two look like puppies…it’s sort of cute really…
Pan: ALRIGHT
FELIX, I NEED YOU TO MAKE SURE YOU DELIVER THE PROVISIONS SWIFTLY TO THE OTHER
CAMPS WE DON’T HAVE.
Felix: For
@^&@^ sakes, make it believable.
Pan: *Whispers* I
am! Don’t make me break character!
Pan: And make
sure HENRY doesn’t find out! It’d be terrible if HENRY followed you!
Pan: *Skips off*
Henry: Teeheehee,
he’ll never suspect a thing…
Henry: Just name
me the new Stealthy!
Felix: Go to Rumple;
BEG him to rip my heart out….
Charming: Hook
was right; this rum tree that he keeps refilling at is great! Want some?
Snow: *Baps it down*
Charming: *Is
sad* One would think you were mad at me…
Charming: Hey, at
least you found out now instead of later, wouldn’t that be awkward when we were
all packed to leave?
Snow: Your David
Nolan is showing. *Stomps off*
Charming: Geez
that was low….
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