Emma: I can’t
believe I saw a guy with an anaconda…New York is so weird…
Hook: This place
has a REALLY nice view…oh hey Emma; I’ve been waiting for you….
Emma: I’m so
confused right now.
Hook: I could
clear that up with another forced kiss!
Emma: How do you
explain everything that was in there!?
Hook: How should
I know? I haven’t been in that apartment!
Emma: Yeah right
Hook: No
seriously, no one would let me though the entrance gate…
Hook: Might’ve
been because I screamed things like “Let me in or feast on my hook” and “Let me
in, the fate of my love depends on it.
Emma: There’s a
camera with my son’s middle name on it!
Hook: So? A lot
of people like cameras and have the name “Henry” on them!
Hook: Wait,
scratch that, I forgot that I’m trying to get you to believe
Emma: you have NO
idea what you’re doing….
Hook: Usually
not, no…
Hook: That’s what
I’m trying to tell you! Your son was up there!
Emma: WHAT?!
Hook: And so were
you…right before I stabbed Rumpelstiltskin with a poisoned hook…
Emma: What?!
Hook: Drink this!
It’ll make you like me!
Emma: NO!
Hook: Oh…*Is out of ideas, because he genuinely
believed that would work*
Hook: Hold on,
I’m trying to think of something….how about another kiss?
Hook: I won’t
spring it on you all willy nilly like last time…
Emma: Nope! *Handcuffs*
Hook: Emma! Here?
In broad daylight?
Emma: Take him
away
Hook: Noooooo!
The King’s men have finally caught up with me!
Hook: I can’t
believe this! My method of forced kissing usually works!
Emma: See ya!
Hook: They’re
going to take my true love potion to the lab!
Cop: Sure…’true
love’ buddy…
Baelfire: ‘Give
up on them’, they said…did they suddenly forget who they were?
Belle: They
forget about a lot of things, usually they forget about me all the bloody time…
Baelfire: Belle,
where did you get to change your outfit? And why did you come here in your
golden gown when that wasn’t what you were most likely wearing when you were
taken? Why did some people come here in clothes they left in and others didn’t
come in those at all?
Baelfire: I’m so
confused that my mind is drifting to even small complaints…
Belle: You
know….I didn’t see a body…so maybe Rumple’s alive!
Belle: Or maybe
he just disintegrated and Regina breathed in his ashes when she went over there
to pick up the dark curse…either way, I’m pleased by developments…
Belle: We could
always zip off and go find answers….
Baelfire: Sure,
but after we get to the castle and get something to eat, I’m starving…
Belle: Your
father used to have a healthy appetite too….for a lot of things
Baelfire: I don’t
want to know that!
Belle: He liked lamb
chops and steak! Geez Baelfire, such a dirty thinker!
Baelfire: I think
you did that on purpose…
Belle: So what if
I did?
Charming: When we
get to the castle, can we just shove anything of Regina’s into her room and
move our own things in?
Snow: Wait, you
want to shove a whole castle worth of stuff into one room?
Charming: Not one
room! Just the basement
Snow: We’re not
putting her in the basement Charming!
Charming: *Pouts*
Well, we’re not giving her the best of everything!
Snow: Why not?!
She deserves it since she was good once!
Grumpy: Hey, so
we didn’t hear any whining for ten minutes about hurting feet and realized
Regina wasn’t with us
Snow: She’s
trying to beat us all there! I knew it!
Regina: Eww,
dirt, it’s all under my nails!
Snow: What are
you doing?!
Regina: Nothing!
Just doing rash things in self-pity again!
Snow: Is that
your heart you’re burying?!
Regina: No, it’s
my newest victims! I’m starting up a collection again!
Snow: You are
aware that a thousand things could happen with that, right? Like insects could
get ahold of it, someone could step on it, a wild animal could dig it
up…erosion could wear it away…do you even know where this would be if you
needed it again?
Regina: I’ve been
separated from Henry for three hours! This is insufferable!
Snow: I got
separated from my kid for 28 years and you got to sit there making comments on
what bad neglectful parents we were so I don’t think you get to whine….
Regina: There!
Now no one will find it!
Snow: You’re a
pain with your heart. What do you think is going to happen to all of us if you
don’t have that one sliver of morality you apparently have left?
Snow: This is a
really bad idea Regina. How many times are you going to make a habit of
destroying who you are over loss?
Regina: I don’t
want your logic! Go away!
Snow: Hey guess
what? We’re all suffering! I just lost my daughter and grandson AGAIN. You
don’t see me feeling sorry for myself over it!
Regina: Self-pity
is the only mode I have!
Snow: You have to
get over it and get some help for your codependency issues. I mean seriously…
Snow: I mean, you
did a great thing in giving them all good memories but you’re totally getting
off on the wrong foot if you’re burying your emotions instead of facing them
like you expected everyone else that you separated kids from to do…
Snow: Now pick up
that heart and stick it in your chest!
Regina: Idiot
Snow doesn’t even realize there’s NO difference with my heart in or out….
Snow: Don’t you
want to be a family with me?!
Regina: How many
times do I have to nearly kill you before you realize that ‘no, I don’t’
Snow: STEPMOM!
Regina: I keep
getting ignored!
Regina: Don’t
look, it’s not pretty…
Snow: *looks*
Regina: AUGH! I
never realized how much it hurts taking out and putting in!
Regina: I’m going
to go terrorize some dwarves with fireballs to make myself feel better.
Snow: That’s the
Regina I know…
*Is watching*
Snow: Huh. The
first breeze in hours….
Regina: I didn’t
feel anything….
Snow: Felt
like…wings….
Regina: Ooo
dinner!
Snow: Regina, let’s
not go destroy the wildlife on our first-
Regina: Here
birdy, birdy, birdy, I got a nice fireball for ya!
Snow: There went
that…
Regina: I don’t
see anything!
Snow: Oh hey
look, something that mutated from the curse!
Regina: What?
We’re not that sort of show…yet…
Snow: Protect me!
Regina: Don’t
look at me! I don’t know what to do!
Regina: Fireball
it, I guess…
Snow: No, Regina!
You’ll start a forest fire!
*Misses*
Regina: *Is pissed and starts climbing the tree*
I’m going up there to kill it with my bare hands!
Snow: No Regina!
You hate heights!
*Plops*
Regina: Is that a
flying monkey?
Snow: Awww, Can I
keep it?
Robin: Hey guys,
what’s up?
Regina: Excuse you;
I had it all under control. Snow here was going to be bait.
Robin: Still
waiting for you to accept me…
Snow: I’ll accept
you! I’ll accept you real good! *stands up*
Robin: Snow
White? Is that you? Our wanted posters were side by side together!
Snow: Oh? I
don’t…know you….
*Theories that Robin
taught Snow how to live in the woods instantly deflate*
Robin: IT’s me!
Robin Hood!
Snow: Oh…no
you’re not…
Little John: He
had to get plastic surgery after Rumpelstiltskin caught him stealing.
Regina: How dare
you speak without permission from me!
Robin: Oh hey,
you’re the queen that everyone thinks is a super crazy mass murder…well I don’t
believe it…for some reason…
Snow: Look
Regina! Someone else that panders!
Regina: Hey, this
might work out!
Regina: Just call
me ‘Queen’
Snow: You’re not
a queen anymore….
Regina: Shut up!
Emma: Mom! I’m
twelve years old; I think I can make it to the school bus down the street by
myself!
Rudo: You need
someone to walk you everywhere, there’s danger in all the places!
Rudo: Yay! Candy!
Emma: That’s right;
enjoy your sugar high…
Rudo: So, how was
your day?
Emma: Not
eventful….but if a man in a pirate outfit and a hook starts following you
around…maybe you should call the police…
Henry: There are
a lot of people dressed like pirates that have hooks for hands; you’ll have to
be more specific.
Emma: He
was….sort of good looking….
Rudo: This tells
me nothing, still…
Emma: New York is
weird….
Rudo: Why did we
move here?
Emma: I don’t
know! I’m still trying to figure out how we ended up in Maine a year ago. I
guess I just tried to go to Boston and forgot where I was going and kept
driving!
Rudo: So am I
going to have to make plans to give the two of you privacy or what?
Emma: I still
haven’t decided yet…
Emma: Hey would
you like to push in the code to get us inside?
Rudo: Really?!
Me?!
*Types it in*
Rudo: SQUEE!
Emma: Easily
amused that one…
Emma: People
still have normal cameras and not phone cameras. Huh. Weird.
Emma: *Gasp!* The
horror!
Hook: I can’t
believe they fingerprinted my hook, what chodes…
Hook: Freedom! Is
that you I’m in love with?
Hook: Oh, it’s
only Emma…..
Hook: I’m not
forgiving you for a long time, Emma! That place doesn’t have my beloved jello!
Emma: You’re a
pirate! You lived on hard tack and rum, you should be fine!
Emma: There’s
something mighty suspicious going on, I don’t remember these photos
Hook: Oh, photos
were up there?
Emma: YES! Are you with Neal?
Emma: *twitches*
And you better give me an honest answer because I know liars! Sometimes!
Hook: You have to
believe me! I’m super legit! I totally love you and if you drink this random
liquid they somehow let me keep even though I technically assaulted you, then your
mind will clear and you’ll love me back!
Emma: NO! You
want to know how creepy you’re being?
Hook: DRINK IT!
Emma: Hmph!
Well…I’m in front of the police station...so…no better place for it, I gues…..
Emma: Does it
taste like chicken?
Hook: I don’t
know! I only was able to scrounge enough ingredients for one! No wait, it came
on a bird! No wait…I don’t know, I tell you both stories….
*Is not comforted*
Emma: Fine
whatever…if it was supposed to be as if the Storybrooke characters were never
here, then that would mean Rumple never needed me to find Baelfire and so why
does that camera exist? I just…*Sigh*
Emma: Ugh it
tastes like wintermint! I HATE wintermint!
Emma: *Remembers*
Whoa!
Hook: Hey, what’s
up?
Emma: You forced
a kiss from me!
Hook: Oh crap,
you remember that?!
Belle: Bae! Bae!
Don’t talk to that stranger! Bae!
Baelfire: DUDE!
Robin: Hey man!
You’re looking good…I mean…really really attractive in all that….
Belle: Pardon me;
he just lost his other family!
Robin: BELLE!
Belle: Squee! I
don’t know who this is…l
Robin: You saved me
from Rumple’s torture!
Belle: No man, I
saved someone else. For one thing he was taller…and way more scruffy…
.
Baelfire: Are you
hugging my stepmom without knowing her?
Robin: No! We
know each other!
Belle: *Sticks
tongue out*
Baelfire: don’t
make me send you to the back of the line!
Robin: Don’t make
me go to the back of the line man, DWARVES are back there!
Regina: Is that
the sound of people having a good time?
Regina; Happiness…I
hate it…
Snow: *Rolls
eyes* I’m mad at you, I didn’t get a flying monkey for a pet.
Regina: Don’t
blame me.
Snow: And here I
thought they naturally revolved around you.
Regina: ……
Regina: I thought
they revolved around the wicked witch….
Snow: *Giggles*
Regina: Wait a
minute, what are you trying to say?
Regina: Huh.
Security has upgraded…
Regina: Good
thing they’re not related to me. Baelfire broke a blood magic cabinet just by
swinging a cane around. I can’t imagine why this would be different!
Regina: Someone
moved into my house!
Charming: Our
house Regina!
Regina: I said they
moved into MY house!
Regina: Reading
my porn magazines….
Regina: Watching
my Netflix…
Charming: You
sure that this isn’t your fault?
Regina: *Looks
back, a bit worried*
Regina: No, I’m
pretty certain this isn’t a security measure I just ended up forgetting about…
Regina: And how
dare you suggest otherwise!
Robin: Hey guys,
you should probably know about the fact that someone else is living in the
palace-
Charming: We KNOW, Robin!
Robin: Hey don’t
get an attitude with me! It’s not my fault I just remembered!
Snow: Were we
ever like those two?
Regina: I think
we are much better
Oh, you can't imagine how much I missed these. Snow is AWESOME. Except the forgetting part.
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