Ariel Part 2

Ariel: Look at all the people!

Snow: I can’t believe that waterlogged invite got us in!

Ariel: Check out my gangster moves!

Snow: Oh don’t do that in public….

Ariel: This dress is nice...

Snow: I know, but I have no idea where I got it from. You’d think that me being a wanted criminal and all might raise more eyebrows here…

Snow: But anything for your chance to get some.

Ariel: That’s the way it should be!

Snow: Yeah, I’m going to the food table…

Ariel: I’ll come with!

Snow: No, there’s no need fo- *Sigh* Nevermind…

Snow: Look at all the seafood!

Ariel: Oh noooooooo!

Snow: Which of your “Under the Sea” friends should I start on first?!

Ariel: Uh….you doesn’t know where that’s been….I should take it.

Snow: Okay, just don’t

Ariel: *Is shoving it down her top.*

Snow: Oh…

Eric: OKAY, Everyone is having WAY too much excitement!

Snow: Oh crap, he’s going to recognize me! Quick, hide me under the table!

Ariel: That’s him! ZOMG!

Snow: Ariel, I might be beheaded if he knows who I am…

Ronald the Guard: This is not your most flattering choices for color on an outfit sir.

Eric: Nonsense! Orange and…bluish green are totally compatible…

Eric: Let’s see…know her, know her, know her…who’s the redhead? Wait a minute, is that SNOW?!

Snow: Now’s your chance for seduction!

Ariel: *Is frozen*

Snow: Go…..

Ariel: *Is frozen*

Snow: *Shoves* I didn’t steal this dress and bathe in the well for you to turn tail now!

Ariel: *Flounces*

Eric: Is that…seafood?!

Ariel: Curse these heels! *Trips*

Eric: Ehehehe, you klutzy klutz!

Eric: I shall assist you.

Ariel: *Makes sure everyone’s looking*

Eric: Do you want to dance or something?

Ariel: I grew legs just so I could dance with you! Wait a minute, I can’t dance!

Eric: Let’s shake our groove things!

Ariel: Uh…uh….

Eric: I know that right now, we’re the only two dancing for some reason but I think you should know that I want to run away with you.

Ariel: Um….what?

Eric: We’re leaving tomorrow on a caravan! Be on it!

Ariel: Uh…well…that’s great and all but you don’t know anything about me!

Eric: Who cares? We got true love!
Ariel: I'm not sure that's been established yet....

*Are spinning in a circle*

Ariel: I could have family for all you know!

Eric: You could have your boring family, or you could have me!

Ariel: Well, that’s true. My dad and my seven carbon copy sisters get a chance at the throne before I do…

Ariel: I’ll consider it!

Eric: Is that a ‘yes’?

Eric: Cause this could all be yours if you just join me!

Ariel: Easy there, you’re edging on cartoon villainy…

Eric: Just say yes and we’ll marry tomorrow!

Ariel: Tomorrow!

Ariel: Crap!ForgotIwasamermaidbye!

Eric: Not that excuse again….

Snow: Did he propose? What’s the story?!

Ariel: Sort of? But then I remembered these gams are borrowed and I realized I couldn’t.

Snow: Well you better think of something because I just realized that being best friends with a queen might get me immunity in her realm…

Regina: She has FRIENDS now?!

Billy: Didn’t you wear that dress already this season?

Regina: Ugh great. Now the hired help is critiquing my wardrobe choices…

Billy: It’s just that…well sometimes the only appealing part of your flashbacks sometimes are to see your wardrobe and-

Regina: I WEAR WHAT I WANT!

Regina: Don’t you like my cleavagalicious dress?

Billy: Uhhh…..it’s a little much *Runs away*

Murphy: Don’t leave me! Don’t leave me!

Murphy: I for one think you look fantastic…

Regina: And don’t for forget it.

Ariel: Man, too bad we can’t switch legs for fins.

Snow: *Is sarcastic* Yeah, cause that’ll go super well!

Ariel: *Is oblivious* I know!

Snow: Oh Ariel…

Regina: I have an idea that’s totally original!

Regina: I will SWITCH their legs for fins! It’s something I thought up of all by myself….

Murphy: I’m pretty sure they just suggested it…

Regina: I SAID I THOUGHT OF IT!

Pan: What horrible trackers, you’d think they’d be less obvious about it….

Felix: I don’t need a spyglass. Snow’s white shirt is obvious from here….also I have perfect vision.

Pan: I don’t hear them all fighting, Regina must be gone!

Pan: I hope she falls into a Dreamshade bush!

Felix: So should we get everything in place?

Pan: You haven’t done that yet?!

Felix: You just told me to hang him up in the tree!

Pan: *Fumes*

Felix: ….sorry…

Pan: Just put him in the echo caves!

Pan: Life is good…

Felix: Hey! Cut him down!

Baelfire: *IS cut down* Eeeek! *Falls*

Felix: Oop, we need a new cage, Pan. This one shattered.

Pan: Typical

Rumpelstiltskin:  Best thing about this doll is that every time I burn it, another one pops in. Hello never-ending kindling.

Fake Belle: Hey Rumpel, I’m feeling mighty fertile right now…

Rumpelstiltskin:  Eh, go away Belle, my son is here somewhere, I can’t leave him now!

Fake Belle: WE can make another Bae!

Rumpelstiltskin:  As appealing as that sounds, I’m not in the mood sweetie, I have a headache and that headache is called my father….

Fake Belle: …..

Fake Belle: Don’t say that about him! He’s a sweetheart and perfect in every way!

Rumpelstiltskin:  Fake Belle, are you high? No he’s not!

Rumpelstiltskin:  He thought Eggs in a Basket was my favorite breakfast! It was never my favorite breakfast, I liked pancakes! HE liked eggs in a basket!

Fake Belle: Oh that’s right! I keep forgetting!

Fake Belle: Still. You should come home. I’m looking mighty tempted at Archie.

Rumpelstiltskin:  go Archie, it’s about time…

Fake Belle: Oh god, it’s Regina! *Is dry heaving at the sight of her.*

Regina: I never did like you!

Rumpelstiltskin:  This is frighteningly symbolic of how characters like us hurt the good guys and nothing’s done.

Fake Belle: I’m dying!

Rumpelstiltskin: I mean I could pop your head off like a grape but….eh, don’t want to.

Regina: This totally isn’t her!

Rumpelstiltskin:  I’ve been making out with the shadow my dad controls? GROSSSSS!

Emma: Mary Momgreettttt….

Emma: So I totally made out with Hook last episode.

Snow: Emma, couldn’t you at least date someone who bathes? 

Emma: I’m not dating him! I’m not even sure when he used a toothbrush last. It was a one-time thing but I think he’s getting a bit obsessed. I first figured it out when he stared carving Mr. and Mrs. Captain Swan in every tree we’ve come across. I thought he just had to go to the bathroom a lot…

Snow: I should remind you that Hook doesn’t deal well with disappointment…and if you do something that he takes as that…..

Snow: Remember what he did to Belle and Archie? Does he even feel bad for that?

Emma: I dunno. It appears that when the villains want to redeem themselves, we have to forget the really horrible things they’ve done so the writers don’t have to work as hard at redeeming them…

Snow: So….are ya gonna do it?

Ariel: I don’t know, I mean he does look great in those pants…but…I don’t know him or anything about him. Running off with him might seem a little rash.

Ariel: Even for me…

Snow: That’s the perfect time to do it!

Ariel: Then there’s the whole mermaid thing…

Snow: Just ask Rumpelstiltskin to pop on some legs for you.

Snow:  He’s a leg man; he’ll do it for free.

Ariel: Ugh, I don’t want to think about that…

Ariel: No wait…I just thought about it….

Snow: So did I and that opened up a lot of repressed memories so thank you for that….

Ariel: I know! I’ll go to Ursula and give her the puppy eyes and then she can’t help but give me what I want!

Snow: That’s sort of specific….I’m sure everyone goes to give puppy eyes to Ursula…what makes you so special?

Ariel: …..

Snow: But I’m sure your deeds won’t blow up in my face….

Ariel: Wheeeeee!

Snow: I am dead…..